Bette Davis, Party, Social Stride, Drinking

Ways To Punch Up A Social Situation

Social anxiety is still so wildly in play. Maybe we can circumvent the shyness with a kind of deranged wildness and think of a few things to punch up a social situation. Instead of getting drunk or taking drugs. Try these if you are feeling insane, it’s a full moon and you don’t want to be asked again – which is mostly the goal.

“So, who do you hate here?”

Instant bonding. If they object then are they really worthy and you can both move on. Great way of taking the temperature – doing a litmus test – separating the wheat from the chaff.

“I personally don’t have a problem with you”

Said to the perfect stranger you’ve just been seated next to. This will inject some HORROR into the evening. Be certain you don’t want to be asked again. You need to already have decided that you hate the person you are talking to and everyone else in the room. This is basically setting off a bomb in the middle of your own social life. In fact, if you say this, it may also be a sign that you are having a nervous breakdown….

If someone conversationally lazy says. “So tell me about you.” just reply, “No.”

Particularly if this person is a man who has been talking about himself for an hour, in which case you could reply, “No, I think we’re past that.”

“What’s the best sex and worst sex you’ve ever had?”

A spicier version of the death row dinner game. People love these. It makes everything anecdotal. It’s not political. But the best question to ask is “What are you really?” That gets you deep. There’s always shag, marry avoid…..but only using people at the party.

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