mary poppins, fairground rides, merry go round, fun, julie andrews

Pandemic fairground rides

Emotional Roller Coaster

Sometimes it goes up. Sometimes it goes down. Or upside down. Or backwards if you’re really unlucky. The point is your emotions are an unpredictable, terrifying, laugh-one-minute-cry-the-next hot mess. You felt exhilarated when things are in the ascent. But just as quickly it all comes roaring down again and the next thing you know, you’re fighting the urge to be sick. You’re strapped in for the ride and it is what it is… white knuckles all the way, people.

Helter Skelter Brain Melter

The downward spiral that is your brain activity at 3am. You wake with a start and the descent begins: You’re not earning enough. All your friends are more successful than you. At what point will you become a child-eating witch who lives in the trunk of a tree, fighting with nesting squirrels? Life’s big questions – for which you have no answers.

Keep Calm and Carousel

There’s a lot to be said for life just going round and round sometimes – unchallenging and mildly pleasant. You never imagined you would ever be the person who started thinking about bed on the dot of 9pm and yet here you are, yawning and running a bath before the credits of the Antiques Roadshow have even finished. Thank God for reassuringly boring.

Relationship Dodgems

Why is it that you keep dating people who just seem to crash into your life in a very haphazard way? For a while, you bump up against each other in an ungainly fashion, pretending that you’re having fun when all you’re getting out of it is a nasty feeling that there’s more to life. So you grow up and manage to turn things around and move in another direction – only to hurtle straight into the next one. MAKE IT STOP.

Ghost Training For Life

There are times in life when you just have to shut your eyes, scream and feel The Fear – because you’ll open them again and find the thing you were scared of was just… OK, actually it was really bloody frightening and you were right to be terrified.

The House of Un-Fun

Tripping over. Sliding doors. Things going backwards when they should go forwards. Ringing… in your ears. Shifting floors. Can’t find your balance. Where are the pills?

Wailing Waltzer

When in doubt… Howl!

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