carrie fisher, meg ryan, when harry met sally, co-bitch, friends, friendship, partners in crime

Everyone needs a co-bitch

We all need a co-bitch: the woman who stands by our sides when we choose to be evil, when we need to be evil, when a light smattering of evil is the only thing that will scratch the itch and relieve the pressure. Our co-bitches are the ones who take our side even when we are being awful, particularly when we are being awful. Awful is the point. With no judgement and an active sense of encouragement. Karma be damned…to hell with it. To hell with everyone. Except my co-bitch. She can stay.

My best friend and I have a thing. She might call and I might ask her how she is and she might say, “Can I just be petty?” and I might reply, “Today we are just going to mind about everything. We are going to notice the annoying stuff and mind. We are just going to mind so much for the duration of this conversation. There will be no generosity of spirit. There will be no allowances made. Present (telephonic) company is absolutely excepted. Go!” And the co-bitchery begins.

There’s a reason why partners in crime is more catchy than partners in virtue. Keeping each other on the straight and narrow may be the bigger picture aim (we are not angels… we are not devils either) but co-bitchery is the secret sauce. The ‘Can I just say this?’, the ‘I’m going to tell you what I secretly think’. It’s not gossip. It’s not scandal. It’s not sexual. It’s just recognising that in the awful lies the sweet, sweet, sweet release.

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