Me: I’ve been feeling more positive this week.
Also me: Don’t want her to think I’m not serious about this.
Me: I took on board what you said in our last session.
Also me: Didn’t understand it at all.
Me: I’m taking more responsibility for my choices.
Also me: Except the ones driven by my abandonment issues. Not my fault.
Me: Am I sleeping better?
Also me: Ahahahahahahaha.
Me: I mean, miraculously, yes.
Also me: I’m actually paying to lie to someone.
Me: I feel like I’m starting to see how destructive my thought patterns are.
Also me: That pain in my toe might still be cancer.
Me: And that thoughts are not real.
Also me: The one about having no money was real.
Me: They’re just made-up things in my head that I shouldn’t believe.
Also me: Good luck with that.
Me: I’m being kinder to myself.
Also me: She’ll like that.
Me: Not giving myself such a hard time about things I’m trying to change.
Also me: TEN POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR!!!
Me: I realise that change doesn’t happen overnight.
Also me: Except for Louise in Upper Four, who literally DID get boobs overnight.
Me: I’m comparing myself to people less.
Also me: Thank God therapists can’t see Instagram activity… can they???
Me: And I’m doing my affirmations in the mirror.
Also me: While crying and screaming.
Me: I’m trying to release the need for destructive relationships.
Also me: Apart from drunk-sexting my ex.
Me: I’m putting myself first, for once.
Also me: It was pretty hot until I saw his new girlfriend on Instagram.
Me: It’s hard, yes, but I’m working on it.
Also me: Probably shouldn’t have then sent him that picture of my boobs…
Me: Self-judgement is not inevitable.
Also me: Fuck, is there now a picture of my nipples on iCloud??
Me: It’s a choice.
Also me: What even is iCloud????
Me: Yes, I agree that we’re really making progress too.
Also me: She must never find out about any of this.