
Beauty School Dropout does much of her ‘grooming’ shopping with her online grocery order. Who has time to go to the chemist unless it’s to grab a prescription? And then one loses focus because the prescription will tend to mean we are feeling ill or mad or sad.
And so, she orders Dr.Bronner’s pure castille liquid soap which smells like macaroons and is also rather cool, somehow. She orders razors and tweezers (!!!) and cotton wool pads and Baby Lotion (the absolute best eye make-up remover and cheap) and Elnett and John Frieda blow dry lotion because it somehow helps prevent a bad hair day from happening. A liberal dose of this stuff all over the scalp and hair seems to pull itself together a bit. More oomph, less frizz, no stickiness just a little more texture and a little less flop and kink. Combined with 90 seconds of her BaByliss Big Hair (which they also sell on Ocado) and a little committed back combing and things are not so bad. Except for one thing. Why does she have a yearning for a slow cooker. Which they also sell on Ocado. This cannot be a good sign.
John Frieda Luxurious Volume Thickening Blow Dry Lotion, 125ml, £6