about How’s your marriage?

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This topic contains 3 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by Misholl 1 year ago.

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  • #2951
    The Midult

    We’re asking because no one else will…

    #3230
    k24

    At the “Note to self: don’t leave those gleaming, sharp Japanese knives lurking too long on the kitchen counter” stage…

    #3326
    Marmite

    Mine was bumbling along until a week ago. A week ago, I discovered my husband had a coke problem and had been having an affair with a Moldovan 27 year old waitress! Bewildered and incredulous go some of the way to describing how I felt.
    Like most major situations in life, I’d always had in my head what my reaction would be should such an event happen. Well, dear Reader, let me tell you that I did not scream, shout and cry and nor did I pack his bags and throw him out on his ear.
    I’m not entirely sure why not; part of me thinks that I’ll be damned if some bit of skirt is going to ruin the last 19 years, part of me is numb, a big part of me wats to protect my kids, their future and any future relationships they will have, part of me can’t bear the humiliation and part of me wants to stick my head in a bucket and hope that it all goes away.
    My husband is a narcissist and I think I clearly have a co-dependency issue.
    I bet you wish you hadnt asked now ..!

    #4834
    Misholl

    Marmite, that takes more heart to say than anything I’ve read on here! Oh, and stubborness. 🙂 I came on this thread a wee nosey as I’m contemplating a second marriage, but your comment took me off at a tangent! Nobody actually knows what they’d do should they find this stuff out. I love that you’re thinking of your children, and their future,and I smiled at the “some bit of skirt” comment. But don’t forget yourself. I can tell you now, I was in an abusive marriage, ex was also a narcissist, I worried about the kids, and that’s exactly why I left. I’m not telling you to leave, but you’re smart, strong and intelligent enough to keep you and your children right through this, whatever you decide. Do what gives you real peace inside, the rest must follow that.

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