We rescue ourselves all the damn time. Out there, constantly trying to save ourselves from disaster and sometimes even managing it. But what about when something happens that feels like a rescue…
You are sitting in a waiting room, feeling like you might be in a waiting room forever and that maybe life is a waiting room. And then a friend sends you an Insta message and you see yourself in it and laugh and are micro-saved.
When you ask someone how they are and they answer you honestly – sure you could both say, “I’m fine.” You could ping-pong backwards and forwards with your ‘fines’. But there’s something very nutritious about, “Actually I am really stressed and not sleeping, and scared and all that…” followed by, “Me too.” Because, life. Because, shame. Because, not alone.
The unexpected compliment
When someone you do not know stops you in the street and says they like what you are wearing. You know the tears you have shed getting to this point. The panic when you hated everything and looked awful in everything, felt worthless and wished you had ’style’, whatever that is. Turns out you do. Joy.
The party save
You are standing in the wilderness at a party. You’ve just arrived and haven’t had time to adjust to its frequency and know hardly anyone and are thinking, ‘I am going to spend the whole evening behind a pillar. Where is the pillar?’ And someone waves and makes room and says, “Come sit by me.” (And they are someone you actually like and haven’t slept with) It feels like a mini miracle.
The ‘It’s still OK to not be OK’
You’ve had a bad breakup, a death, a bad divorce, scared yourself – and everyone rallied. But now it’s eight months later and sympathy has moved on, of course it has. And then a person looks at you and says ‘Of course you are not OK’. And you feel seen. And better.
The cold call
So how does it feel when someone calls you and says, ‘I’ve been thinking about your situation’? You haven’t asked for advice. You haven’t sought sanctuary. But when you realise that someone has taken time to consider where you are at and might even have some help to offer… Oof. That’s charming.