Fertility is like a card game. You have no idea what move to make until you understand what has just happened; the information you have just received.
So, when someone – wisely and usually kindly by the way – advises you to get your AMH (Anti-Mullerin Hormone) and FSH (Follicle Stimulating Hormone) tested to see where you stand on the old (!) egg front, do not think that will be that. Everything about trying to have a baby – or even thinking about trying to have a baby – raises as many questions as it answers. Once you hop on to the eggscalator, you have absolutely no idea where it will take you, whether it will lead you to bulldoze through various firmly-held dealbreakers or whether you will spook, hop off, and consider it dealt with.
Just as flirtations become obsessions, so an open-hearted glance in fertility’s direction can set you on a course to literally God only knows where. And when you are sitting staring at a preg test after four rounds of IVF, waiting to see if it is positive, then God will almost certainly come into it.
So be gentle with yourself. Be easy on yourself. Donor eggs may seem a horror from the bottom of the eggscalator but a journey on this new-fangled contraption changes you. People who get drunk and shag on the sofa and then go ‘Oops!’ do not know about the eggscalator. It is for the special people. And it can take you to the heart of who you are and what you want. We wish you a royal flush…