Dear Lord can we beat ourselves up when we get going… we are experts at emotional self-harm. So here are some Midult mantras; non-wanky ways to adjust our belief system towards something more forgiving. Some small bundles of words that make us feel better, carve new neural pathways, stave off the nameless dread…
Perfection? You can keep it
You are under no obligation to be the same person you were yesterday or even five minutes ago. You are under no obligation to wear matching knickers and bras and always excel at your job, exercise regularly and text everyone back. Perfection is for other people.
Please do not feed the fear
The fear will find you, you know it will, there is no need to give the fear anymore fuel. Like when you are lying in bed and you can’t sleep and you are worrying about money, cancer and whether or not it’s OK to *like* the new Harry Styles album? That way lies MADNESS.
Why wouldn’t you?
Why wouldn’t you order a Deliveroo instead of cooking? Why wouldn’t you say you can’t go out because you are really tired and you are also trying to watch the whole of Old Twin Peaks while NEW Twin Peaks is still a thing? Why wouldn’t you start your own business? Why wouldn’t you buy the red bikini or book a holiday with your best friend or have 5 coffees in a row? How much coffee is too much coffee? Sorry, I don’t understand the question.
Never ever give up on your hair
Roots, that crunchy dryness, the terrible sun-in orange from years of dyeing, sorry colouring, sorry enhancing. So what if the time between hair appointments is getting smaller and smaller? So what if you wake up every morning like you’ve been wrestling with an alligator and you suspect your hairdresser wants to give you a Golden Girls haircut? Never, ever give up on your hair.
I am listening
OK universe. I am here, I am present (sort of), I am in the moment (is this the moment, I think I am in the moment, am I in the moment? Or is the moment over there?), and I am listening. Listening for the signs, ready for the riches, looking for the guidance, I am ready and listening. Still listening. Hello?